Monday, May 14, 2007

I Think I Smell A Rat



Saturday May 12, 2007, 11:30
We find our hero settled into an evening of relaxation while watching television. He's already watched his beloved Cavaliers fall to those Nets from New Jersey. How a group of nylon stitching defeated a gang of swashbucklers remains a mystery. He's currently trying to find humor in the Molly Shannon-hosted episode of SNL but that humor is few and far between.

I hear some noise in the kitchen. Nothing big or anything and i attribute it to the wind. There are times, like we all do, that I imagine I have ghosts in my apartment. Not that this scares me or anything...its just a result of living alone in rural America. So I hear these noises and look into the kitchen and I catch something moving. I check it out a little more and what do I see? A mouse! Or Mus musculus for you scientifically oriented readers. I scare the little bugger and he retreats underneath the sink.

This means war. It is late and night and I think "well this can wait until tomorrow." Then I think about it some more and I really don't want to be asleep with thoughts of Mr. Mus musculus running around my apartment having his way with whatever he wants. So at midnight I head to Wal*Mart. Let it be known this is the first time in my life that I'm glad Wal*Mart is around and that it is open 24 hours.

Side note: Being in Wal*Mart at midnight can be interesting. The one thing that suprised me the most were the mothers who were there with their kids. I'm usually in bed by midnight...yet I saw at least 3 kids aged 8 or younger, including one [awake] baby. This can't be good for them.

So I search for traps and some reason they are in the same aisle as soap/detergent. Whowouldathunk? I then need to decide which kind to buy. I decide to go with the glue traps so that I'm not awoken by a snap of the traditional traps. I head home, set the traps, and head off to my slumber.

I awake in the morning and find my victim stuck in the trap. He's still alive and twitches every once in awhile, but I got the sucker. I dispose of him into the trash and revel in my victory. This is only one. While I am happy I got this guy, I don't know if he has reinforcements coming. The traps are still out but I haven't seen/heard any other mice. Hopefully this guy was just a scout. If he wasn't, my troops are armed and ready.

3 comments:

Dwayne Rudd said...

Dude, was it still alive when you threw it in the trash? Cause thats just inhumane. Knock it out with a hammer, or stick it in the microwave, or something.

Or better yet, after you smash it with the hammer, hold onto it for us until we can find Mustafa's car. . .

J-Money said...

There has got to be quite a bit of overlap between the tags "unwanted visitors" and "Wal-Mart".

MoL said...

DR: have you joined PETA? It's a mouse and it was in my apartment uninvited. I'll take care of him the way I see fit.

J-Money: I burst out laughing at your comment. In my (red)neck of the woods, pretty much anyone in WalMart are unwanted visitors.